| Five Practical Ideas to
Help You Get from Email to Live Dates
Idea
One: Talk on the phone
first. Ok, the other person's picture
looks fine - so let's take some time getting to know the other person on
the phone. It may be that they look great, send nice emails, but are hard
to understand, or sound like "something's not right." Pay attention to
your instincts. Talk to them on the phone, at least a few times, before
agreeing to meet them in person, in a very public place.
Idea
Two: Questions to Get Started
With? Here's a few icebreakers that you'll
want to know about in your emails and phone call to that other person: 1)
What do you like to do on your weekends? 2) Do you like to go out a lot,
or stay home? 3) What do you like best about someone you're dating? 4)
When you eat out, where do you like to go?
Idea
Three: Ask them upfront: After a few emails and a couple of phone calls, you may
be ready to meet them in person. It's up to the both of you. If they are
evasive or hesitant to meet, ask them why. It may be simply that they're
shy. As long as you can phone them without problems, that may be fine.
But, also look for red flags (eg answering machine always one, phone not
answered regularly).
You may want
to ask them upfront, how they'd like to go about this, to see what their
ideas are. After talking on the phone a few times, you should know whether
or not you'd like to meet. Make plans, in a safe public place. Then,
have fun meeting them at a local restaurant or mall.
Idea
Four: Being Ready for
Romance Getting started in a new romance
is both thrilling and a time of great uncertainty. Myself, I like to plan
on finding a woman who's both a friend and someone I'm attracted to.
Getting from a photo and description, to "first contact" by email, to
phone call and then meeting in person, is lots of fun. Being ready to meet
someone also means you may need to juggle your schedule a bit - as dates
take up time, as you're having fun on the town with that new person in
your life!
Idea
Five: How Often Should I email or
call them? On the one hand, you don't want
to seem overly desperate. Then again, you don't want them to think you're
not interested. Finding a middle ground depends on what each person feels
comfortable with. Remember, one woman may want to send emails twice a
week, another, every day. Each person expresses themselves differently,
and works on a different schedule. Part of becoming a good dating partner
is finding out who you're compatible with, and adjusting your style to fit
the other person's.
Emails: It's
disappointing if an email isn't returned within 24 hours. It also looks
over-eager if emails are returned within 2-3 hours. So, find a middle
ground. Same with phone calls - always return calls within 24 hours, but
don't call back immediately, unless you're on familiar ground with that
special person you're talking with.
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